(com) Preface

..........................................
(cannot believe that I started to write this.....)

05/12/08

I love dreams.....I mean real dreams, not day dreams or dreams that need to be fulfilled. I always feel that we, human being, don't belong to the earth. I am so convinced that the earth is not designed to support us. We are disasters to the earth, and so is the earth to us. We are all desperately lonely on this crowded planet. The closer we connect to each other the more lonely we have become.

But dreams connect me with an unknown world where I feel I belong. I always know dreams are my bridges to a place where I came from back to a billion years ago.

I like vivid dreams. They can keep me in that world longer. My favorite dream was the one that I walked in a secret forest full of maple trees. It must have been autumn, since all the leaves were red. I stepped on the leaves and enjoyed the cracking sounds of my footsteps. I was not in a hurry to go anywhere. I knew no matter which direction I was heading, I could not walk out of that forest. At that moment, the only place I wanted to be was in that forest. Sometimes, I also enjoyed some sad dreams. I was once drowning in a pool. I yelled for help. Faceless people were watching. But nobody helped me. Everything that can happen in real life, happens in my dreams: death, joy, sorrow, sex, dream, desperation..you name it.

I also like the sensation of waking up. It is almost like the aftertaste of a piece of creamy chocolate. Sometimes, I wake up with tears in my eye, and sometimes, my heart still hurts...I always try to remember these feelings, since when I have completely awoken I came back to the earth, this meaningless world where we have no other purpose but to live.

I started liking dreams after I was introduced to a flower, Valerian. A friend of mine, Ye, once told me about this flower when I was complaining about my sleep problems. The first day I took Valerian, I walked on a beach in my dream. I had so much fun playing with the water. The sea was as blue as the sky. I grew up in a inland city. I had never been to a beach. I was overwhelmed with the joy, and then I realized that there is another world. From that moment, all my questions about life have been answered....

People who truly knows about me will never disturb my dreams...Of course, there is only one person who knows about me: me. I hate dream interrupting phone calls...After I picked up the phone, my experiences in another world cannot be remembered...I have learned all kinds of tricks to ignore phones. Eventually I get ride of all my phones.....That still didn't stop people from interrupting my dreams..................




Knock..Knock........Someone was knocking on my door aggressively.... Whoever that person was, he had to have a real good reason. I got up, put on my pajamas, and walked to the door. I looked through the door eye....It was him. He shouldn't be here.....At least not now.....I stood there, and didn't know what to do. Then I heard him saying: Qingna, I knew you are at the door. You need awake and come with me....We just had a deadly earthquake. You are the mapping director. You need to come to the office, and the central government needs us to monitor the earthquake activities....Quick...You need to get a cellphone. I am your boss. I cannot always come here to pick you up whenever I have an assignment for you.

I was then completely awake. EARTHQAKE (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2008_Sichuan_earthquake)?! As said, the earth is not for us...We were left here..........