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After I met Ye, I often wonder what could happen if I have some madness in my own nature. What could happen if I kicked the ribs of the boy who spilled some ink on my cloth? What could happen if I broke the arms of the boy who dissembled my bicycle? Would I still be me or there would be a red page in my biography dictating my violent nature? Will I then become a prisoner of my own biography?
After I met Xia, I often wonder how she could respond to Fe’s story. Xia was studying Chinese literature in my University. She was about my age. Mysteriously, her acquaintance with Fe was somehow relevant to me, confirming that Fe meant to stay in my memory. When I first met LD, LD discovered that I liked to dance. The university had dance parties almost every weekend. He then persuaded Fe to company us to a party. It was indeed a dreadful thing, since I had to dance with LD who knows little about dancing. I felt being stuck with him. LD could not help but stepping on my toes several times. My usual dancing partner stood in the corner and stared at us with a jealousy look.
LD asked indecisively: “was your partner chasing you?”.
I glanced at my partner who was still standing at a corner: “No. Not really. He didn’t even have my phone number.”
“But I can tell.” LD said this nervously.
I said impatiently: “I will never date a boy who I met in a dance party.”
“Why?”
“I don’t like boys who like to dance. I don’t think there are good boys who would truly enjoy dancing.”
“But it is a typical way to get acquainted with girls.”
“Boys should get acquainted with girls with proper introduction, not in a room as dark as this one.”
That was exactly the moment when Fe met Xia. Fe waived to us several times when he was dancing with Xia. We waived back delightedly without trying too hard to have a closer look at Xia. I only noticed that Xia was a tall girl. I had thought it was an ordinary dance. When the music stopped, Xia would disappear in the crowd. When Fe wanted to invite Xia for the next dance, he would find that Xia started to dance with another boy. After all, it was not the best place for Fe to impress a girl. He looked short among boys who enjoyed dancing and his steps were clumsy. That was also how Xia noticed Fe. I quoted directly from her about her first impression on Fe: “Fe has all the amiable quality except that he was too short”. But after the music stopped, Fe approached us and introduced Xia to us. I guess his subconscious mind recognized his disadvantages in a ball room. He suggested that we should find a decent place to have a drink. When we were all seated, he turned out to be the most amusing person. LD was a man with few words. I was as ignorant as a high school student. Fe was the only one who knew about almost everything. Xia laughed and laughed. I couldn’t remember any topics that we talked about. After we sent Xia back to her place. Fe said this with excitement: “I think I have a chance.”
“A pretty good chance.” After a while he decided. I smiled and nodded with disbelief. No girls would want to date a wanted man even if he owned his own business. No girls. Besides, love never starts in a ball room.
My only explanation to the beginning of the love story between Xia and Fe was that LD was very much in a dating mood and such mood was infectious. The next day, instead of calling Xia himself, Fe asked me to invite Xia for the dance party. He was strategic. That was a first time when I noticed his fear of rejection. I called Xia and Xia declined my invitation. Fe was visibly frustrated. To comfort him, LD and I didn’t go to the dance party at that night. We stayed in LD’s dorm with boredom. But at that night, Xia phoned Fe.
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